Reasons to fire your client

  • Your primary contact point is in the procurement office.
  • They've just implemented an enterprise-wide e-commerce solution: EBay.
  • At the last trade show, they handed out branded trucker hats.
  • A 60 Minutes crew is sitting in their office - and you didn't invite them.
  • Your client only has a hotmail account - at the Kinko's.
  • You just can't get over the internal motivational video - the CFO and CMO covering Whitesnake's "Here I go again."
  • The CEO hit on Maria Bartiromo - on air!
  • In Vegas for a trade show, the CMO asks you to keep the reporter busy because he wants to take a hooker upstairs and do blow off her stomach.
  • The Russian security service drops by "for a chat."
  • Whenever you use the word "media," the aged founder starts chattering about Marshall McLuhan and acid.
  • They believe that a front page photo will steal their soul.
  • The client asks "Can you get us PR but also keep us way under the radar? Thanks."
  • Their IR officer spends most of her time day trading.
  • "Do you mind delaying your invoice for two weeks?"
  • Their idea of targeted marketing is a t-shirt cannon.